My Husband’s Mother

Six boys in under seven years. The fact that she still has her sanity is proof she has been sneaking bliss.

Everywhere I look, I see evidence of naysayers being cast aside.
Little expressions of what brings her joy are on display in this corner or that.
Mementos from family trips.
Her family wall of portraits, young and old.
A shelf full of children’s books.
Her garden is a masterpiece transformed to greatness by her culinary prowess. Yes, she is that good.
Perhaps the greatest evidence of bliss is a beautiful trillium painting, her painting, hanging in the den.

The most recent picture of us. She graciously tagged along while I was shooting research pictures at San Francisco Zoo. Tim snapped a few shots with his phone.

I treasure her presence in my life. Not only because she is the mother of the man who holds my heart, but the woman to woman wisdom she brings to our relationship is immeasurable. I have benefited greatly from her experience.

It is only fitting that every so often her birthday occurs on Thanksgiving.

Happy Birthday Mom,
Love,
Mary

“Trillium” by Norma Livingston

Just One Last Thing

A phone call at 5:30 a.m. at our house is either from the East Coast (3 hours ahead) or someone needs help. At the first sound of Bernice’s voice, I knew Walt was in trouble. They were at the ER, Walt, 91, awoke that morning with chest pain.
It took me an hour to get to the hospital after Bernice’s call. Walt was in pretty good spirits when I arrived.
As per the usual routine, our conversations the next few days covered many topics. As Walt shared his favorite grilling recipes we segued to homegrown meat chickens. I told Walt we’d have to get together and grill some fresh chicken from our spring chicken harvest.

Gruesome alert.
The day before, we butchered our first batch of meat birds for this season. We hang our chickens by the feet. The birds are calm in this position. While grabbing the head in one hand we quickly severe it with one slice of a sharp knife with the other hand. The bodies thrash a bit, but it’s a quick, clean death for the chickens. Sometimes though, the headless bird bodies thrash a lot and dislocate wings or legs. Meat birds are fragile that way. Those birds get parted out rather than freezing whole. This method also tends to fling a fare bit of blood about, leaving the butcher looking like a scene from a B grade hack and slash movie.
After sharing this with Walt, he shared a tip. When a person lives over 90 years, they accumulate a lot of life experience.
When Walt was a boy, his folks raised meat birds to supply local restaurants. They harvested over a thousand chickens in a season. This year we raised 32, a paltry poultry number by comparison. Walt’s job was to dispatch the birds. Like our method, he also hung the birds by their feet. Then he poked the knife through the open beak to the back of the throat to slit the jugular vein. He explained, “They calmly bleed out without the thrashing.” I made a mental note to remember this for our next round of chicken harvesting.
This last weekend, we harvested two batches. Starting out, I dispatched the first couple of birds like I had in the past with a quick slice to remove their heads. Then I decided to give Walt’s technique a try. It was a little awkward at first, but then both Tim and I got the hang of it. It certainly was a calmer method of dispatch, and much easier on the meat.
Walt would have been proud of us successfully using his tip. He also shared how to capon a rooster…but we haven’t tried that yet.

Walt was always happy to share information to make others’ lives easier. His tidbits of fatherly wisdom usually came in the form of “Just one more thing…”

Our last words in the days that followed were the familial, “I love you.” Our last moments were while Bernice and I prayed with him as he passed.
His stories, “Just one more thing…” will always hold a special place in my heart. And many, like this one last thing, have become a part of my life experience.

Walt was laid to rest at the Northern California Veteran’s Cemetery yesterday.

Walter as a boy.

Walter as a boy.

May we all be as loved as Walt was, and may we all love as Walt did in his lifetime.

Walter a few weeks before he passed.

Walter a few weeks before he passed.

Walter Ernest Matthews
March 5, 1924 to
May 16, 2015.

Grandkids – Family Portrait

I love doing art projects with our grandchildren. I especially enjoy adorning mugs with their masterpieces for our morning coffee enjoyment.

This year, they each drew a full body self-portrait along with the rest of their household. This little beauty became a wrap around mug with each of our little ones contributing their part.

Tim and I enjoy our morning coffee time…and having their art as a part of our morning ritual is bliss indeed.

Family Portrait by our grandkids.

Family Portrait by our grandkids.

 

Birthday Bliss

Image

An awesome start to the day - pure bliss!

An awesome start to the day – pure bliss! – Thanks to my wonderful family for these treasured birthday wishes!

Color My Family

Our grandchildren love to color. A few years ago, I made Color My Family coloring books for the girls. The little man was not interested in structured coloring at that time. Now, at four, he does it all the time and not always in the proper place.

I started to print a Color My Family book for him, and then I realized they have grown so much they needed new line art to color.

I have been sneaking in family images amongst the other duties of the week. I hope to have it done soon. It is pure bliss to watch their faces when they realize they know the people in the coloring book. Try it sometime for a little one in your life.

color page for grandson

GrandThing3 – a new line drawing for his new coloring book.

Sweet Nellie Left Us Today

Nellie 2000-2013

Nellie 2000-2013

The house is quiet today. It is the first day in a long time that I do not have a dog by my side in the office.

THE FORESTER ARTIST

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Just One More Thing

In 1997, the pastor of our parish asked if I would assist a fellow parishioner named Walt to purchase a computer and learn how to use it.

When I greeted Walt, I recognized him immediately. The previous summer I took a portrait of him with his wife, Ruth. Ruth had Alzheimer’s and wasn’t too keen on me positioning her for the photo. Walt began speaking to her softly, “Now, Ruthy, it’s okay, she is going to take our picture.” She caught his eyes and was immediately calmed. Her eyes danced in the photo. It was obvious to me, there was something special about this man.

With this we began our journey.

Walt had a dairy ranch, much of his computer lessons involved teaching him to enter data on his heard, run reports, etc. Walt is bright and eager to learn new things, so he caught on quickly.

A 30 minute session took 4 hours.

The tech stuff was accomplished in the first and last 15 minutes. The rest, well Walt told stories and if he noticed me looking at the clock, he said, “Just one more thing.”

And so our routine was born. I started planning for the longer visits. In time, he needed no assistance with his computer, but we went through the motions anyway.

We all need story tellers and Walt is a master.

Little by little I learned of his youth. I learned of his days in WWII. Which roses in the yard he liked the most and about stray voltage in the barn.

Sgt. MatthewsPhoto from the Walter Matthews collection

Sgt. Matthews
Photo from the Walter Matthews collection

I laughed and cried when he shared stories of his daughter, Pat. She was the light of his life and brought much joy to Walt and Ruth. Pat died at 37 from primary biliary cirrhosis.

Not long after that Ruth was stricken with Alzheimer’s. For many years, Walt cared for her every need. The kind of care not born of obligation, but born of love.

A few years after Ruth passed, Walt was blessed with another chance for a love in his life and Bee came into his heart and ours.

Bee and Walt, just after Valentine's Day 2008.

Bee and Walt, just after Valentine’s Day 2008.                               Photo by MaryALivingston

Every once in a while, we still sneak a morning together and a cup of tea. We make no pretenses of caring for the computer, the time is ours to enjoy the stories and share a little bliss.

If you ever have the occasion, ask Walt to brew a cup of tea and tell you a story.

Your life will be richer for it.

I love you Walt,

Happy Birthday

The two of us. Photo by Bernice Bennett (Bee)

The two of us. Photo by Bernice Bennett (Bee)

Hidden Beauty

Camera shy people never cease to amaze me. The lengths they go through to avoid the lens are impressive. As is the case with our daughter-in-law, Amanda. Most attempts to capture her on film end like these two shots.
dont-shootHowever, if we are sneaky and distract her with finger painting or puppies, we can catch her in a moment.

The finger paints were for our grand-daughter. Much to our surprise and delight...Amanda and Stephen enjoyed them the most.

The finger paints were for our grand-daughter. Much to our surprise and delight…Amanda and Stephen enjoyed them the most. photo MLivingston

Puppies serve as a perfect distraction to capture her beautiful smile. Along with our grand-daughter, she enjoys the pups. The one she is petting will grow up to be the sire to her dog.

Puppies serve as a perfect distraction to capture her beautiful smile. Along with our grand-daughter, she enjoys the pups. The one she is petting will grow up to be the sire to her dog. – photo MLivingston

If an official shot is required and she will gladly be in the frame with someone she loves. She is all smiles.

This is perhaps one of my favorites. I was so surprise how easy it was to take her picture for their wedding invitation.

This is perhaps one of my favorites. I was so surprised how easy it was to take her picture for their wedding invitation. – photo by MLivingston

The most interesting thing about camera shy people is they are often the ones behind the lens. I think Amanda’s awareness of the discomfort the lens brings to others gives her sensitivity when she shoots portraits. Amanda is a gifted photographer.  No, it is not her day job, but a visit to her Lightly Spiced Photography by A Adams  Facebook page reveals her eye for composition, lighting and attention to a shot’s emotion. I hope you visit and see what she is up to.

I enjoy the portraits she takes. My favorites, of course, are the ones of our GrandThings.

Keep smiling and keep shooting –

Happy Birthday, Amanda
We Love You!

In Search of Dirt

GrandThing 3 sets out to find dirt.

GrandThing 3 sets out to find dirt.

There are defining moments that burn themselves onto our internal processors. I remember vividly four years ago, today,  the moment he popped into this world all wet and shiny new. But in my mind’s eye, he will forever be the little boy in search of dirt.

When he visits, he inevitably is drawn to his daddy’s old Tonka toys. So it was, one spring day. With a lot of rain, the wild grasses and weeds had taken over the fields. What this little boy really needed was dirt.
Nothing more.
Nothing less.
Just dirt.
He spent the better part of the afternoon dragging the backhoe and tractor around, looking for a proper place to put them to work.  Alas, he spies a pile of decomposed granite.

Bliss.

Happy Birthday GrandThing Three!

Bliss! perfect dirt for play.

Bliss! perfect dirt for play.

Fishing with Grandpa

Fishing with Grandpa – The Forester Artist

Showing off his catch. This one went back after the photo.

Showing off his catch. This one went back after the photo.

GrandThing 3 tells Grandma all about his painting.

GrandThing 3 tells Grandma all about his painting. “He caught grasshoppers with Grandpa and they caught a fish.”

Good-bye Tom-dog

Golden Bo Thomas SH WCX“Our animals shepherd us through certain eras of our lives. When we are ready to turn the corner and make it our own…they let us go.” Author Unknown

Tom dog came home to a young 11 year old boy. Now 26, Tom's "boy" misses him the most.

Tom dog came home to a young 11 year old boy. Now 26, Tom’s “boy” misses him the most.

We knew this day was coming. The average lifespan of a retriever is 10 years. Tom-dog was 14 years, 8 months when we said good-bye today.

He came home to our youngest son many years ago and was the grand-pup of our first retriever. In the learning hands of a growing boy he was trained into an outstanding hunter and companion.

Stephen and Tom with Tim and Blaze following successful Senior Hunter Qualifiers.

Stephen and Tom with Tim and Blaze following successful Senior Hunter Qualifiers.

When his boy grew to manhood, left for college, got married and started his family, Tom stayed with us.  In the years that have followed, this magnificent family member has been greeted by 3 rowdy grandkids that he loved dearly.
Tom-dog always loved kids. It is only fitting that Tom-dog’s grand-pup, Jake, now resides with Tom-dog’s first person and family.

Tom dog (R) walks with Grandthing 3 and Jake (L) Jake is Tom dog's grand-pup.

Tom dog (R) walks with GrandThing 3 and Jake (L) Jake is Tom dog’s grand-pup.